Thinking about writing

[brainofck]

So. The thing is, I've been writing Stargate for months now.

I dropped Arena to just relax a little before moving forward with it. At the time I felt there were at least as many chapters left to write as I had already written, possibly more, if certain things inspired me.

But I was tired, and I wanted a change, so I thought I would just write that little throw-away SB/EW thing.

Which, due to my idiot brian, morphed into a WIP of it's own.

Then I got mugged by Stargate.

Which has essentially taken over every brain cell I have.

And now, I have health issues that are likely to interfere with my limited writing time.

The stupid thing is, this whole writing thing is totally supposed to be a hobby. Hobbies are supposed to be fun, right. You're supposed to do what feels good and enjoy yourself.

But I feel so much guilt attached to my WIPs.

Which really is dumb. Because Arena, though there's more to thing about, has had a really good run, and the most interesting SB/VM part is written and essentially complete. It will always have SB/VM underpinnings, but the unwritten stuff is mostly VM/OB and SB/EW and various permutations thereof. What's written could easily be declared a complete SB/VM epic. OK. Epic's a bit much. But you understand what I'm getting at here. It could be self-contained as it is. Why fell guilty about not "finishing" it?

And Throw-Away was originally ONE idea. It kinda morphed in a good way. But one reason I stopped writing it was because I didn't know exactly what to do next, and Stargate was an easy distraction. So we got way more Throw-Away than I ever would have expected. Why feel guilty about not "finishing" that?

I am very concerned that these two won't ever be "finished" or not for a very long time, anyway. And it really is making me feel sad and guilty and that is just stupid.

Then, of course, there are the two unfinished Stargate WIPs. Just one measly chapter of Possession left, but it is eluding me.

And I have ideas for the angsty drabble series, that include trips to Minnesota and pie, actually, but that's pretty low on my priortiy list.

My main annoyance about the Stargate stuff is that I'm so fatigued these days, and so frequently ill, that I don't have the time or energy to invest in just getting them over with.

Plus, my stupid brain. I'm writing the stupid!porn in slow motion. Which in a way is nice. I feel no pressure to finish it. And it will be the most finely crafted porn I have poked away at in some time. But it is SO SUPREMELY DUMB!!!!! *glares at brain*

On the other hand, maybe the brain has developed a self-defense mechanism against WIPs. SG-31, Sacrificies, Love Bites... None of them look to develop into anything huge, thank you, Brain.

Anyway, those are the things I am thinking.

*sigh*

Comments

[amise.livejournal.com]

Pssst!

Get healthly first. Take care of your family.

Then, write smut. If you're in the mood.

Don't feel guilty about dealing with the things you have to take care of first.

"Health issues"? I will think good thoughts your way.